Moderation is something I have to force. If I subconsciously choose it or not myself, to be obsessed with stuff, like carrots, eclipse-mints and coffee, I don’t know. All I know is that I obsess to feel good, and I used to think that the feel-good had to come from some external source; food, caffeine, taste, herbs, tea, vitamins. All the time I twisted and turned those supplements, that superfood, those vitamins; I never trusted that the feeling good, happy and bubbly could come from inside. Internal happiness. All though It is all connected, what you put in your body reflects on how you feel inside, I can’t no longer depend on outside sources to “fix” my inside. I don’t want to need anything to feel good, I want to find what I need from inside me.
I recently read an article about obsessive and addictive personalities. We who trade one addiction in for another. What I loved about the article was that instead of telling you how to get rid of that treat, it said to treat it as a gift, and focus on the good things that you can use it for. Embrace your addictive personality and create something good. Obsess about the good things. I’m now addicted to feeling good, and I’m scared of anything that can take this feeling away from me. I’m looking inside me for things to make me feel strong, happy and confident when I need it. Not supplements, not drugs. I obsess with happiness, and I want to dedicate my life to help people see the happiness in the world. I want to share my experience of unhappiness, and how I finally found piece of mind with others, so that more people can do the same. And I want people to understand that we all deserve happiness in our life. All the time. Not just on the weekends. Not just when we are drunk or high. All the time. In the real world too.