Interests and emptiness

I have been lost for many years. I remember Adrian asking me what my “hobby” was and…I didn’t know.. I had no idea. What even is a hobby? My life was messy with a weird structure. I couldn’t name one thing that I was interested in, besides going out and, trying not to eat. But I was hungry. And obsessed with food. I did/do like cooking, but I don’t know if I liked it for the right reason. I loved reading up about food, diets, ways of beating the system, but then again, for what reason?

When Adrian asked me I had nothing. What does that do to your time? Like I walked around in this world, just lost and with no purpose. Nothing to look forward to. I did not believe that I had the power to create a good future for myself. I waited for someone to do it for me. When I think back I wonder where the fuck I was taught all these things? It was like someone had stolen all my interests I used to have as a child, and there was nothing but an empty room left. An empty room with a lack of confidence, interests, hobbies…

Him asking me, made me question what I wanted, and I started to look for it. Before I asked someone to tell me. What I wanted wasn’t align with the life I was living; so I changed it. We changed together. I was open for my life to take a turn, and I was willing to do whatever it took to change it. I wanted to live for life, not for parties, I wanted to live for being happy, not trying to beet every system in the world. And I wanted to live with love for everything that has to do with me, and the people around me. And two years ago I decided to do whatever it takes for me to get my dream life with my man and actually my best friend. And since then, everything has just slowly fallen into place. And that was not a second too late.

43 thoughts on “Interests and emptiness”

  1. Pingback: Aws alkhazrajii
  2. Pingback: GVK BIO
  3. Pingback: GVK Biosciences
  4. Pingback: Aplikasi klinik
  5. Pingback: warehouse for rent
  6. Pingback: Free UK Chat
  7. Pingback: freemoviesz
  8. Pingback: warehouse for sale
  9. Pingback: pag1e111
  10. Pingback: détails
  11. Pingback: interview
  12. Pingback: Hovedpine
  13. Pingback: archiwnetrze.pl
  14. Pingback: fitness gear
  15. Pingback: UK Chat Rooms
  16. Pingback: horse love
  17. Pingback: 獲取更多信息
  18. Pingback: Orleans homes
  19. Pingback: GVK BIO News
  20. Pingback: matzi.de

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.