My body and diet; a confused subject

I love food. Most of us do. Just everything with food make me all excited inside. Melbourne is seriously the best place to live in if you like your food. I can talk about it forever. How mr Miyagi’s nori tacos make me want to slap myself in the face because they are so delicious. And their tempura broccoli. And supernormals lobster slider. The stake at rock pool. Eggplant fries at Leftbank. Matcha mylkbars vegan eggs and the orgasmic artichoke mousse balls at Movida. Just thinking about this make me feel all light headed. Fuck, that China bar buffet in Springvale. OMG.

As amazing as all the Melbourne food is, around my blowouts I try to eat rather clean. I fight many battles in my head, on a daily basis. My brain tells me what I shouldn’t eat, and my body asks for what it needs. I can wake up being happy with my body and go to bed and see a million faults with it. But the more I learn, the more happily I talk to myself and the more love I give my body, the voices of doubt and negativity gets lower.

I do work out a lot, and that makes me hungry. Sometimes I look at what other people eat and I compare it to what I eat and I feel like a rhino. I often think what I can cut out from my diet to shred that extra bit. But then I think what my idea life is. And the most important factor in my ideal life is energy and happiness. I love to feel energetic, I love to workout and I love to eat. Food gives me the potential of being the most energetic version of myself and when I start cutting, obsessing and valuing looks over happiness I fail my ideal life. How I look is important to how I feel, but instead of changing my body and thinking that a shitty percentage less body fat will make me happy, I have to work on being happy with that tiny bit of fat on my body. Because that’s normal. I’ve been super skinny many times, and I’ve never had any energy. I haven’t lived. I know that skinny isn’t happy, so why do I want to be skinny? The thing is that I’m actually happy with my body. I just have a few voices in my head telling me that I can be even happier, if I just… I just have a feeling that those voices aren’t going to bring me any more happiness. They are only going to guide me to a place with less energy, more obsessions and less happiness. It’s funny how you can be happy with your body, and sort of want to change it at the same time.

At the end of the day I eat to nourish my body. I eat to condition my body and give it all the building blocks that it needs to stay strong, energetic, happy, healthy. I eat because I love what I eat. I eat clean, raw and nutrient dense things because I know that is what my body want, and not what my brain craves. I also eat carrots.

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