It seems like when I need it the most something always forces me to sit down and reset my goals. Today it was at work. I sometimes laugh at my own goals because they can seem a bit hard to achieve from where I’m standing today. I’m planning something of which I have no idea how to even beguine to reach. But that must be what separate us from each other. What you do proceed to chase after until it’s in your possession?
My goals at the moment frustrates me a lot, because I haven’t made anything concrete happen in order for me to move closer to them. I’m stranded. I’m here and scared to take actions. Scared to become a joke. But if it is my dream, should I care if trying to achieve them would turn me into a joke? If I truly try, then that cannot make me a joke, because it would be a joke not to try. After all they are my dreams. Never have anyone regretted that they went for something they truly believed in. ever.
Talking to people around me, friends and colleagues made me understand that I can achieve this if I want to. And to put my goals out there, outside my brain and get others take on my goals opened up new pathways on which I could walk.
So today I’m making plans. Plans for the future and then I’m breaking down my plans into smaller plans. In the next year I will grow my writing business, finish writing my first book and be in charge of selling a new Swedish product here in Australia. They are my one year goals. Oh, and taking that fucking driver’s license that I’m an expert to avoid practising for.
If I finish one chapter a month for my book, I’ll achieve one goal.
If I start networking and connecting to other writers and writing required businesses I will achieve another.
After all, these goals are mine, and no one will achieve them except me. I am the one who has to take actions, I am the one who as to ask for help when I need help. I am the one with these dreams, and I am the one who will live those dreams in the future.
I’ve felt so lost the last couple of days. I haven’t known what I want to do or how to get there. I haven’t known what I identify myself with and how to choose happiness. Sitting down and work out what I want and getting people to help me figure out the next steps really helped me ground myself. I now feel like I’ve gotten back my drive. I want to do this, so I will.