Last Monday I felt like I had no energy to choose happiness. I wasn’t sad or angry, I was just flat. I couldn’t even be bothered putting my flatness into words. But I did it anyway, because what is Monday love without Monday love right? I wrote about being in bed feeling like I brought last nights shitty mood with me into the new day, and how I simply wanted all grumpiness I carried inside me to disappear so that I could feel light, happy and bubbly again. I thought about all my musts and should and as much as I know I would be proud of myself if I dealt with them all today I didn’t want to do anything whilst I was feeling like that. If I start doing things that should be fun when I’m in a bad mood, nothing good will come from it. Chances are I will feel sorry for myself for “having to” do all of this on my day off, rather than feeling inspired to do them. I decided that I will only do happy things today, run a little, go out for lunch with the family, have frozen yoghurt, and do some shopping. No musts. Once I cleared my calendar for the day, went out for some sprint training and had a shower I actually felt like dealing with some of my tasks. And I ended up being quite productive because I only had a small window to deal with them in.
I have taken on a couple of more things than I usually have to deal with at the same time, and there is no point of doing any of them if I will complain while I do them. I’ve taken each of them on because at some point they excited me, and if they don’t anymore, well, I shouldn’t do them. The meaning of life is to do things that make you happy and excited, sometimes you have to deal with stuff that might not make you happy, but when you have a choice, choose what make you excited.