I wrote this article, for www.thiswomancan.org, about my journey from being stuck in a place, in a body, in a mindset full of hate and ungratefulness into a journey of seeing what I have, finding love for myself and my body and finally everything life throws at me (even though I cant always see it and feel it strait away)
“I found myself frustrated again, feeling that life wasn’t treating me right. I felt like I was doing everything “right” but got nothing out of it and I sat with this feeling of failing when I remembered how I, for so many years, never believed that I could love and be loved at the same time – today I do love someone who does love me back. I remembered how I never believed that I could ever eat without guilt and feel love and peace for my own body – today I feel happier than ever to live in my own skin and food is magical to me. I have actually learnt to communicate and feel my body and I can tell what it needs which to me, is completely mind-blowing.”
Reed the whole article here: https://www.thiswomancan.org/nothing-to-grateful-experience-everything/
I did something today that I am feeling super proud of. Something that I feel excited about. And if I wouldn’t have done it I would have kept thinking about it. This made me realise what I want to do in my life. And what I want to do is sharing a message of self love. That’s what this is all about. Caring and loving yourself like you care for others. Because then you can go on living from a place of love.
I realised today that that’s a message I want to send out. And I realised today that every day I want to work towards making young girls and boys see themselves as worthy. There are so many things in the world that needs to be done, but I cannot focus on all of it. Sometimes you have to choose where you would like to make a difference, and for now; this is where I need to be.
I went into a girl school today, speaking to 25 15-16 year old girls about how to find self love. I spoke with them about eating disorders and how I manage to separate myself from that place. I was so nervous before I honestly considered jumping in front of a car to break a leg or something, but I then realised that I’m going to that classroom to tell the girls not to let their inner critic control their lives. So if I let my inner critic control my life I would be a hypocrite and a wannabe. So every little thought of self doubt that appeared in my head I fought off with a strong and encouraging one. I was fencing myself the whole week. My confidence won and I did a really good job. Most importantly, I really spoke from my heart with an intention of making every single girl in that room curious about self love and how to honour themselves. And I felt like I genuinely could share my thoughts.
After I was all shaky. I also felt quite empty. Where do I go from here and how can I do more? How can we make sure we teach the kids that loving themselves is key to respecting yourself and then you can figure out where you want to be in this world. And who you want to be.
This is something I want to be a part of. This is something I am a part of. <3