I know that my writing isn’t perfect in any way, except in my own way. I use the wrong words, my grammar is nowhere even close to perfect and there are a lot of things I could do better. Like going through my posts before I upload them to avoid printing mistakes, to name one. But I’m semi lazy and I lean back on the fact that this blog is mine, and I like imperfection. I embrace imperfection. I don’t care about grammar as long as I get the core message across. The reality is though, that other people do. I know so many grammar-polices out there who get physically frustrated when a sentence is a bit off, or when you add or forget an “s” somewhere. Who express hate to the miss-use of the language. Each to their own I say.
Some of my goals are to be able to write for a living, and create a book. Maybe two? And I realized, when I recently got the feedback on my writing that my shit-grammar actually is a bit of a problem if writing is what I’m aiming for, that I cant hide behind my open love for imperfection all my life. I love imperfection because it is easy and I don’t have to put in time to learn the rules of the English grammar. I thought for a couple of seconds after I received that feedback that maybe writing isn’t for me, but at least I tried. Then I stopped myself. Because I do love it – creating stories with words. I’m just too scared to fail and to lazy to learn. As most of you probably have realized by now; grammar wasn’t my favorite subject in school. I realized that if I want to keep writing and achieve my goals with writing as a profession I have some work to do, and I realized that I actually want to do it. I want to learn because I want to get better because in the end; I love to write, and I want to write.
Sometimes I like to take the easy way out, I don’t want to put in the hard work, but when it’s something that will bring me closer to my passion, why would I even consider not trying to get better?
Five minutes after I received the constructive feedback that hit my stomach like a space-stone and made me doubt my passion, I signed up for an English language semester at a university, because fuck it. Because why not?
Set backs and challenges are amazing in a way, because they make you re-consider if what you are doing, why you are doing it, and if what you are working towards actually is what you want to do with your life. It make you question your “why” and force you to either give up or leave the space of feeling sorry for yourself and take you into the space of “bring it on, I’m going to do what it takes to achieve what I want.” Ant that shift my friends, that’s kind of a cool feeling.